My Name

I wanted to see you today, but when I called you didn't answer. I don't understand your silence. We had such a wonderful time yesterday curled up on your couch, binge watching old episodes of Friends, eating ice cream out of the carton with a spoon. You skipped work for me yesterday.

I thought I was important to you, even though the other day I overheard you telling your mother that you wish I would just go away, that you can't handle my neediness or my loneliness. I'm sorry that you're my only friend. I love you. Why can't you love me? Why do I have to try so hard to get your attention?

I saw you last night. I know you're taking pills and hiding it from me. Why can't you be honest with me? I won't judge you. I love you just as you are. You know you can tell me anything.

We've been together for so long that sometimes I think I take you for granted. I believe you'll always be there. But you've gone and made other friends. You've taken up other hobbies. You've filled your time with other things that are not me.

But that's okay. I'm patient and I will wait for you to come back to me. Because you always do.

My name is Depression.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Submission

My eyes are open to darkness. I've long since learned how to make my way through isolation without the use of sight. I am confident in my movements and do not stumble or falter. A sudden, glaring light reveals an intrusion into my carefully crafted world of silence. It's talons are sharp and dig roughly into my surroundings, leaving deep, jagged scars. I look around in confusion, not recognizing what's happening to my sanctuary. I watch in horror as the intruder melds itself into everything I have spent so much time perfecting. Something foreign snakes its way into my consciousness so slowly it feels like a caress. I am not alarmed but rather curious so I welcome it openly. The whispers of promises are pretty and alluring. With my attention held I don't notice the chaos that continues around me. Selective words are sung into my ears, a lullaby, as if to a child to dream them to sleep. I close my eyes and listen, forgetting all about the destruction before my feet. Gentl
Read more

I Am

You're 3. You're soon going to have a little brother. He's going to take up a lot of mommy's time. Don't blame him. He's a baby and he needs mommy just a little more than you do right now. You're so strong and independent, so funny and creative. You don't see it now but some day you will consider him a friend. You're 4. The fighting is going to end soon. Please remember that what happens next is not your fault. Daddy loves you even if sometimes he doesn't know how to show it. Be patient with him. He misses you just as you miss him. I know mommy can't fill that space. Don't be angry at her for that. She's doing the best she knows how. You're 6. You're so friendly and beautiful. You are lovely and do not deserve what will happen to you. You are not to blame. Tell someone you trust. You are loved. You're 9. You are smart and kind and gentle. Girls can be so cruel for no reason and you don't deserve it. There is nothing wr
Read more

Split

Hello, my love. I've missed you. What did I do? Are you mad at me? You always do this! You can't do anything right! I love you. I hate you. You fucked up. I can't do this. Hug me. We're done. I'm sorry. Why do you want to dwell? You never let anything go! You just want to punish me! I love you. You are nothing to me. I miss you. Don't you want me? I need you. I love you. I never loved you. I'm done with you. What do you want for lunch?
Read more